I'll Probably Date Your Daughter When
She Turns 18

Nothing ruffles your buddy's feathers like a shirt like this. You're probably not serious, but you are the Forever Single Friend. Its a possibility, that's all you're saying.

Even Your Mom
Doesn't Like You

Its true. She tells everyone.


Eight Beers and
You're Still Not Interesting.

Are you used to running into boring and annoying people at the bar? From now on, when you turn and walk away mid-sentence,
they'll get it.


You're So Ugly, You Make Blind Kids Cry.
(Onions Too)

Its not their fault, or is it?
Are they even trying??


Some People Should Not Reproduce.
You're One of Them.

You know they are out there. They might even be your good friends. Regardless, they should be told. Some of them don't even know.


We Are Laughing At You,
Not With You. Always.

You know the scene in Austin Powers when all the bad guys are laughing in unison? Its just like that, except they were taking over the world. We just think you're stupid.